Review: Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion (PlayStation 3 (version tested), Xbox 360, PC. Bethesda, Ubisoft)

First of all, a postscript to the great love/hate RPG debate. Landon clearly misses the point with his criticisms of Oblivion. It's obvious that you don't take on the hellish minions of Oblivion without levelling up a bit first. You're gonna get fucked up by annoying lil' scamps ad nauseum unless you go in prepared. You wouldn't climb Everest without a little preparation now would you? And whilst I can understand Landon's problems with turn-based combat, I find it hard to swallow that he doesn't dig the first-person combat of Elder Scrolls IV. What's not to like? Rest assured that Landon and I will be fighting this one out in a gladiatorial arena with maces and broadswords. One of us will not come out alive...

PC owners have been harping on about how great Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion is for just over a year now and 360 owners have had the privilege of playing it for a good while too. Now, finally after being initially promised as a launch title, PS3 owners can see what all the fuss is about in the most definitive and graphically polished incarnation of the game. For those not familiar with the hugely popular, hugely successful RPG phenomenon (both of you), ES IV allows you to create your own fantasy character-with customisation options to rival EA's Tiger Woods PGA series-choose their race, skills and attributes, then unleash them upon the vast province of Cyrodiil.
Starting out as an imprisoned weakling in a potato sack and wrist shackles you're entrusted with protecting the Emperor of Tamriel, Uriel Septim (silky, booming tones courtesy of Patrick Stewart). Inevitably, things go awry and the Emperor gets himself assassinated by the Mythic Dawn, a rogue cult embroiled in the dark, daedric arts. You can probably guess what happens next. It's up to your tailor-made avatar to go out into the big, bad world and locate the rightful heir to the throne of Tamriel. Oh, and close the perpetual Oblivion gates that have sprung up out of nowhere spewing forth demonic minions. Easy peasy. This main quest is merely the wafer thin meniscus on a tall, heady brew that comprises ES IV: Oblivion. You don't even have to tackle the main quest if you don't want to. In fact, you can do whatever the hell you like. Want to be a mass murderer? Want to hunt vampires? OK. Want to be the hero, famed all over Cyrodiil for your courageous acts? Of course you do. It's the best way to tackle Oblivion, free of consequences such as jail time and massive fines or bounties on your head. Most players will inevitably end up becoming the shiny-shield, heroic ranger type because the rewards for following this path are easier to obtain and plentiful. Thieving, raping and pillaging is just too difficult and ultimately detrimental to your progress. The Shed chose to pursue the dark path after completing the lion's share of the quests; it's only then that you feel you can really cut loose.

The green, green grass of Cyrodiil.

Cyrodiil is arguably the most rich, detailed, sprawling world ever to be rendered digitally. It is a thoroughly convincing, solid and lavish universe, unimpeded by pop-up, seam ripping or any kind of graphical glitches. The sole annoyance is the split-second loading times, which only stand out because you unavoidably sink into a hypnotic, trance-like stupor as you traverse the picturesque landscape. This tiny, insignificant interruption momentarily snaps you out of your comatose state and reminds you that you're still playing a game. Pointing faults out with such an ambitious and accomplished title seems puerile, akin to criticising a naked Scarlett Johanssen because she has a fungal nail infection.

Oblivion is one of the best arguments for purchasing a nice, big HD TV. On a standard-def telly, Oblivion still looks great, but in HD, it looks extraordinary. Textures are truly eye-popping, night skies are illuminated by millions of tiny ethereal stars and giant distant planets, rain creates tiny ripples on the surface of a lake and greenery looks lush, vibrant, alive. Cyrodiil is so breathtakingly beautiful that you can almost taste the mountain air, smell the grass and trees; drink it all in, it's your world to explore to your heart's content. And discovering everything will take weeks, months of extensive play as there's oceans of depth in here, hundreds of quests and tasks to discover, numerous paths to follow, many different roads to travel.

Cyrodiil boasts a massive population of NPCs, no two the same, each possessing their own agenda, politics and beliefs. Talking to them all is a mission in itself, there's a lot of repetition in what people say-for instance close the Kvatch Oblivion gate and be prepared to hear half the population drone on about how honoured they are to meet the 'hero of Kvatch.' Flattering the first few times, it makes you feel like a Cyrodiil celebrity, but after the 300th time it grates a tad. You can skip any irrelevant lines of dialogue so it's really not a problem; it's just us, trying to pick tiny holes in the game because it's otherwise flawless. There must be millions of lines of dialogue, so repetition is forgivable and pretty scarce. Forget we said anything.

"This sword is too heavy!"

Some might argue (cough, Landon) that the combat is "unfair, clunky, basic," which is half-true. It takes a fair bit of levelling up before you become comfortable with your character, swinging your chosen weapon with a modicum of finesse, unimpeded by mud crabs, rats, wolves, imps, scamps and other irritating little creatures. It's then that Oblivion really comes into its own as combat and spell casting becomes second nature and flows naturally. For the impatient amongst you (cough, Landon), The Shed urges you to stick with it, it's more than worth it, because Oblivion is an instant classic, a genre-defining RPG that has to be seen to be believed. If you're not already a fan of RPGs, this is your best chance to get on board and become a convert. Not convinced? Just play it. Still not convinced? Then you should probably check your pulse because chances are, you're probably dead inside.

Level up: 10/10

Why I Hate RPGs...by Landon

I have no problem being a dork, a geek, a freak. Us people are just into something - comics, fantasy board games, science-fiction, cheese - in a big bad way. I find the geek's deep enthusiasm for a chosen subject infectious, no matter how seemingly throwaway or dismissible some might say it is. You love the wines of southern France and northern Spain, I love my games. It's all love, a love nonetheless. I love my games dearly, they entertain and tell great stories, but there's one genre that has never converted me to its ranks: the RPG.
Really 'hate' is too strong a word, but my misgivings with these types of game means I leave them well alone. I never had my watershed moment as Rich did with Final Fantasy, I was too busy playing Metal Gear Solid. Without the currency of nostalgia and monk-like patience, I find myself easily frustrated with most RPGs I dabble with. Maybe to dabble is to misunderstand, but if a game doesn't grab me in the first few hours of play then maybe it isn't doing its job. "You've got to persevere, it gets better when you're powered up to Level 7." 23 hours of game time later...am I finally ready for the fun to begin?

In the beginning...
I find the lack of immediacy in RPGs incredibly frustrating. After all the praise heaped on Elder Scrolls IV:Oblivion, I decided to take a bite. The first couple of hours made an impression. I was humbled, ready to eat my flat-cap with a flapjack - could I have been wrong all this time? I found myself hunting deer under a starry sky, bow and arrow in hand. I was a hunter, a ranger, born under the sign of a thief but destined for nobler things. I'd been seduced into enjoying myself. I'd created a cool looking character and thought he'd soon be on the road to greatness.

And then I stumbled at the first hurdle, repeatedly dying at the first major test of my skill. Surrounded by fire, I'm stalking through pitch black towers, unable to see anything, getting attacked by little red demon bastards. Fireballs! Shit, I didn't drink my 30 second fire resistance potion! Do I have to do this with every enemy I meet? It's going to be a long road. Why isn't my shield working? Ah, I'm dead. Again. Is my character not skilled enough with a blade? Is he weak in the dark arts of magic? Do I really give a fuck anymore, killed by a minor bad guy for the umpteenth time? I turn off the console and read a book in defiance.

No mistake, I appreciate that the game dispenses with turn-based combat. I've never understood the joy of this system; 'I hit you, you hit me back, let's keep it fair now.' Oblivion has enough fucking menus as it is, so I figured I'd be sold on the real-time fights, but I wouldn't exactly call them visceral or exciting. It feels choppy and unfair, the underpowered underdog left with no fighting chance. Oblivion is a big step in the right direction, but I can still pick large holes in its attractive surface fabric. The 'be anyone, do anything' concept feels diet-light. Essentially you level up the same attributes until each character is virtually identical in all but appearance. It deals with over-familiar themes, biting Tolkien and savouring it. And yet the world is so rich in detail and this goes a long way to making it an original force in its own right.

Here's the rub....
See, that's the real issue - I'm in love with the idea of the RPG. 'Sand box', 'open world', however you paint it, the essential essence has huge appeal to me. I've always been a sucker for expansive environments in games. I want to be able to sit my character on a rocky mountain top in the rain, eating a baguette as I look out over a valley veiled in night. I want to wash in a lake, hitch a lift on a fish, dive for buried treasure. I want to sit in a tree, sharpening my sword, taking a shit from high in the canopy. I appreciate great art design in games and RPGs are one of the only genres that allow the gamer time to appreciate the craft.

I'm not completely without patience. I'm no action junkie, no great lover of bombastic war games and the like. I love the intricate details that make a game world convincing and believable, no matter how fantastic. Perhaps my expectations are just too high and I'm waiting for games to catch up. For me a living, breathing game world still remains a future prospect. I love the idea that a game world doesn't necessarily revolve around the protagonist; citizens of RPG-land going about their business; working, socialising, fucking. I love that prospect and hope one day to leave the realm of the real and live full time inside that future console, saved as data on some organic, pulsing hard drive. When I can take a realtime, convincing shit in an RPG, I'll become a fan. I'm sure Bethesda Softworks are already working on it.

For all my mistrust, I remain optimistic about the future of the genre. As RPGs merge with other genres and create hybrid styles, interesting titles will be born. It's a common example, but it's very easy to see why the Grand Theft Auto series is so popular - it combines RPG elements of detail with pick up and play flourish. GTA IV I hope will expand on the character advancements introduced in San Andreas and the interesting elements of empire building shown in games like Scarface: The World Is Yours. But let's face the music, GTA has no desire to be an RPG.

On the flip, Bioware's Mass Effect does not disguise its roots. As a sci-fi head the lack of ogres and spells is pleasing news to me. Without fanfare, it looks fantastic. From what I've seen of the combat, it looks as immediate and action fuelled as any solid shooter. Couple this with a story taking in solar systems, planets and space stations, all open to explore and interact with socially, and it may be the RPG I've been waiting for. Here's hoping I don't have to fuck about with 5 different menus just to eat a food item. Maybe I'll be able to sit down in restaurant and have a civilised meal. Maybe I can get my character drunk in some crazy spaceport nightclub. Maybe it'll be my entry ticket.

Movie Review: Spider-Man 3 (May, 2007)

Comic book franchises simply don't come any bigger than this. On its opening day Spider-Man 3 made $59.3 million at the US box office beating previous record holder Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (2006). There's a good reason that the Spider-Man movies make so much money. They're incredibly entertaining, well-made, popcorn blockbusters that beg to be seen on the big screen. A movie that succeeds in being such a huge spectacle, needs a screen to match. They're essential multiplex viewing and waiting for them to come out on DVD simply isn't an option.
Of the trilogy, Spider-Man 3 is by far the most ambitious, juggling not only Peter Parker's (Tobey Maguire) complicated relationships with Mary Jane (Kirsten Dunst) and newcomer Gwen Stacey (Bryce Dallas Howard) but also three unstoppable villains this time. Of the three villains, the imaginatively named 'New Goblin' (James Franco) is the least successful, adopting a cheesy, 'edgy', extreme sports style with his ski goggles, mask and flying snowboard, he resembles nothing from the original comics. The presence of Thomas Haden Church as the fugitive Sandman more than makes up for this however, his Sandman brings a much-needed dose of pathos to the proceedings as a criminal out to raise money to support his sick daughter. While this may sound hackneyed and maybe a bit cliché, Haden Church's performance is executed with such aplomb that you're never in doubt that Sandman's motives are sound even if his methods aren't.
Venom's late addition to the cast whiffs of studio interference, shoehorning a fan favourite into the narrative to please the die-hards. As comic book fans, The Shed was not disappointed; he's pretty much spot-on. The only negative is the lack of screen-time he's given and the hasty spontaneity with which he corrupts enraged photographer, Eddie Brock (Topher Grace). Venom's a great character and while he faithfully makes the leap from page to screen, he simply isn't done enough justice here, rendered entirely peripheral to the overall plot. Sam Raimi's original choice of the Vulture would have worked better or developing the ongoing tease of Dr. Connors (Dylan Baker) in this and the previous two movies to the include the Lizard would have been an inspired choice. Seems like a wasted opportunity to us.
Such minor quibbles pale into insignificance as Spider-Man 3 is a frenetic, action packed blockbuster boasting plenty of fast-paced set pieces as well as some fresh and funny sequences - Bruce Campbell's extended cameo being a noteworthy highlight.
As always, Spider-Man 3 raises the bar again in terms of comic book action. No other comic franchise manages to faithfully adapt its source material whilst successfully crafting such an accomplished action flick. Also worthy of mention are the special effects, the genesis of Sandman worthy of special mention, being both jaw-dropping and genuinely affecting at the same time.

Spider-Man 3 is more than likely the best blockbuster you’ll see this year. Its balance of drama, comedy and action is so well honed that you’ll be hard pushed to complain. There’s something here for everyone, which is why it’s no mystery when Spidey movies consistently set the box-office ablaze.
Spider-Man 3 is a nigh-on perfect conclusion to a fantastic trilogy, which begs the question, will the saga live on with Spider-Man 4? The answer is sadly that we want it so bad, likelihood is, it'll never happen. What? It's been confirmed? Scratch that then.
****

Why I Love RPGs...by Rich

Role Playing Games, of all the many videogame genres has the most prominent geek stigma attached to it. No other genre carries such heavy connotations of Dungeons & Dragons inspired geekery, informed by a history of sad, anorak stereotypes that refuse to fade away. Personally, I encountered a number of D&D, Warhammer loving elf-fanciers during my school days, but I'd hope that playing an RPG and becoming consumed by the same type of universe doesn't necessarily place us in the same camp. While this may sound like I'm in denial, desperately trying to justify my relatively new-found obsession for orcs and goblins by distancing myself from the nerds that I had the good fortune to go to school with (sorry, no names, but you'll know who you are if you're reading this), I'm merely pointing out that RPGs make up only a portion of my gaming Recommended Daily Allowance. One of my five a day, if you will. A quick bite of hearty shoot-'em-up, a sports game snack, a driving elevenses, a slap-up dinner of RPG action and then a wind-down with, oh, I don't know...a puzzle game supper? It's all part of a healthy balanced, gaming diet. Yet, increasingly, my love for the RPG has steadily grown over the past ten years and continues to bloom unabated.

Once upon a time…
It's a story that I'm sure is a common one among gamers weaned on the first PlayStation. I got into RPGs after being swept up by Final Fantasy VII's (1997) epic plot. Even today it still lingers in memory as one of the finest moments (well 70 odd hours), in my life as a gamer. I never got into RPGs on my first console, the Sega Master System (were there even any?), as I was simply far too busy playing Sonic The Hedgehog and Alex Kidd In Miracle World. When I upgraded to the Sega Mega Drive my time was monopolized by the likes of Revenge Of Shinobi, Golden Axe, Street Fighter II, Mortal Kombat, Road Rash, Desert Strike, Sonic (again), Probotector, the Streets Of Rage series and much, much more. Once again, there may have been some great RPG games on the MD, but to this day, I remain blissfully unaware of them. When I finally got my sticky mitts on a PSX and got to play games in proper 3D (not the fake kind that Probotector had, which incidentally made my eyes go weird) it opened my eyes to a whole new world of gaming. To me the Final Fantasy games (VII and VIII, I missed out on XI) were instrumental in demonstrating where the future of games lay. That is in immersive, vast, intricate worlds and at the time FF VII seemed like the absolute pinnacle of what I could ever expect from a game of this kind. By the time the PS2 came around, I was foaming at the mouth at the prospect of FF X, and while it didn't disappoint it turned out to be essentially more of the same. For my opinion on the latest in the series, FF XII, scroll down a bit.

Here’s the rub…
Central to the problem that RPGs have always been synonymous with D&D geeks is the preoccupation with conventions and characters that have been with us since Tolkien wrote The Hobbit and Lord Of The Rings. Orcs, goblins, elves and wizards have seldom been cool and when placed into a slow-paced environment, accompanied by apparently sterile action involving hit-points and long, drawn-out battles of attrition, it’s really not all that difficult to see why RPGs have earned their reputation as stuffy, dated games best left to their intended, acne-ridden demographic. Sadly, I would have agreed until I was seduced by the Akira style ‘cyber-punk’ aesthetics of Final Fantasy VII. Peter Jackson’s hugely successful movie adaptations of Tolkien’s masterworks didn’t hurt the RPG much either. Take a look at Elder Scrolls and the influence of PJ’s movies are abundantly clear. ES positively reeks of cinematic Tolkien. Not that that’s a bad thing, far from it. To claim to possess a love for RPGs whilst only having played certain instalments of the Final Fantasy series may seem a tad illogical, but it's a love nevertheless. Maybe this article should be entitled: 'Why I Love Final Fantasy.' And that's what I would have labelled it until I recently discovered Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion. Not since traipsing through the slums of Midgar for the first time have I been so absorbed by a digital landscape. And therein lies the beauty of the RPG. No other genre has the innate power to completely engulf a player in its unique universe, indiscriminately stealing away hours of your life back in the real world and refusing to ever give them back. It’s testament to Elder Scrolls IV’s rich, detailed and stunningly realised world that spending time there is never a chore and simply trekking through its lush greenery and treacherous mountains is one of modern gaming’s greatest experiences. Furthermore, Elder Scrolls' 'be anyone and do anything' premise makes it unique in that no two people will experience the same game, which encapsulates the depth of what Bethesda’s masterpiece has to offer.
Some may argue that I should get a life and say that I need to get out more, and while this may be true, I can think of nothing else I’d rather do than sit in front of the TV and see what adventures I’ll embark upon next with my daedric armour clad, level 25 dark elf. Hey, maybe I have become just like the geeks that I tried my utmost to avoid in school, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. I love RPGs, and if that makes me a dork, then so be it.

There’ll be a review of the PS3 version of Elder Scrolls IV on The Shed in the next few weeks. Also, coming soon...Why I Hate RPGs...by Landon.

PlayStation network: the story so far.

It's been nearly two months since the PS3 came to European shores and although Sony promised UK gamers a 'wealth of game and video content' (so says the official UK PlayStation site), we've failed to see very much appear in the PlayStation store over the past six weeks or so. In terms of video content, all that's currently available are a bunch of adverts and trailers, most of which you'll have probably already caught on TV anyway. Sony's 'This Is Living' ad campaign is available in full but why you'd bother with repeat viewings we're not too sure. A selection of HD trailers for movies like Speed and X-Men 3 are all well and good, but they're all a bit, well, pointless. Why there aren't any current trailers for theatrical releases is a bit of a mystery as it would make perfect sense to make them available for free download on the PlayStation store. A missed opportunity if you ask us.

Then there's the game content, the real meat of the PlayStation store experience. We were told that we'd be able to download loads of free demos, full games including classics from PSone for the PSP and exclusively developed titles for download only, a la Geometry Wars on Xbox Live.
What have we got at the moment? A handful of downloadable games, the only truly essential one being flOw alongside a paltry selection of free demos, the majority of which are racing titles. The Shed doesn't want to sound like a spoilt child, but we want more!! (WAAAAAGH!!) Frankly, we expected more and a cursory glance at the US PlayStation store reveals some great retro games (Mortal Kombat II, Gauntlet II, and, erm, Q*Bert), classic PS one titles and more. It's still not nearly as much as there should be for a facility that's been online for almost the past six months! C'mon Sony! Get your fingers out!

Back on European soil and Genji players are well catered for with a triumvirate costumes and a set of Ridge Racer 7 decals make up the entirety of the available game add-ons. Wow.

It's easy for us, up on high in The Shed's solid gold and ivory citadel to diss Sony for their lack of content, but there is a lot of new stuff around the corner. David Jaffe's (of God Of War fame) Calling All Cars, Nucleus and additional content for Resistance and MotorStorm should fill out the anaemic array of items on display.

Hopefully, there'll be a whole raft of additional new content appearing on the PlayStation store in the near future, but we're not going to hold our breath.

The overiding triumph of the PlayStation network is its ease of use. In comparison to Xbox Live's front end, it's much less fussy and far easier to navigate. Most importantly though, it's free, which is always a plus. Then, wouldn't you prefer to pay if you had access to the depth of content offered by Microsoft's well-established, clearly superior service? It's an unfair comparison since the 360 has had a major head start over the PS3, but it's one that we'll make nevertheless. And when it comes to offering a glut of old skool thrills nothing can match the Wii's Virtual Console, which boasts Mega Drive, NES, SNES, N64, TurboGrafx and Neo Geo titles. Why isn't Sony doing the same thing?! There's easy money in retro games, surely? The Shed would go rabid for downloadable versions of Streets Of Rage II or Samurai Showdown. There's a vast, untapped goldmine of nostalgia just screaming to be exploited and there must be millions of gamers just like us who would pay to play old games, right?

PSN's saviour will obviously be the revolutionary Second Life inspired user hub, home which will offer a new and exciting way to communicate with fellow gamers, arrange online games and more. What's more. the exciting and innovative LittleBigPlanet is built entirely around user created content and along with home, PlayStation network will really come into its own. Until then, we'll have to be satisfied with playing Genji dressed as a pirate or a cowboy. Sigh. For now it looks like we'll have to accept that the PlayStation store will remain a barren wasteland for the time being. Let's just hope that home turns out to be as good as Sony claims because if it's as sparse as its store, expect users to lose interest fast. Don't say we didn't warn you, Sony.